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**I aM nOt aLoNe**

Posted by Mea L. Antaim on Monday, August 23, 2010
"Lonely...hey miz Lonely...i'm miz lonely...all on my own..." I happen to love the lyrics of MR.LONELY-Akon Song so much. Why? yes Why? The answer is as simple as..because I love the music...because i am touched by the lyric...and most importantly I AM A LONELY LITTLE GIRL. Of course you might say "what makes you feel lonely? you have both parents and 9 siblings plus you still being love and cared by your friendz and relatives...Yes for sure those people being mention earlier could be my loneliness killer but in the other hand they are just react as Mr Panadol to my pain...to my loneliness. I am not saying that i don't need them .. NO .. just that i felt that the love i received from them is not enough to full fill my emptiness in life. There are two important person that truly gives effect to my life and able to convince me that i am not alone at all. Both them were the person that i love and i appreciate the most. Without them i would be nothing and nobody. They give colours and lead each inch of my life. I still may live without my family, friend and relatives but when comes to these person...without them my life would be suck and useless. Thank you lord for being always by my side and lead me through any circumstances in my every day life. Thank you for your kindness and care that you shows me. Thank you for once sending HGP *The master of his mind* into my life. In any opportunity that i might have, I wanna let *HIM know that he is the person i appreciate and i love and i need the most. THANK YOU LORD!! THANK YOU HGP*the master of himself*

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4 Comments

Anonymous says:
December 17, 2010 at 2:02 PM

Hello Mea..
Nice to meet u & it is nice reading your blog :)

Anyway, eventhough your blog contents considered limited in updates but i still find it interesting to read. And it seems like you're holding back something from your past. Are u?

Well, correct me if i'm wrong & please be certain that this comment of mine is merely just for sharing.

Anyhow, from your blog's post i can see that you love your ex-bf sooo much. But i'm curious, if you loved him then why didn't you & him find mutual understanding on how to solve the obstacles between you guys? What did exactly problem that encountered & made you guys separated?

Mind sharing it with me? :)

Mea L. Antaim says:
January 1, 2011 at 12:00 AM

Hi there Anonymous ( whoever it is ). well thank you for showing ur interest in my blog anyway ... ( what more, its out of update ..umh umm!!)

ya you are right ... i bet there is something that i am holding back from my past and its truly makes my every day seems miserable..haha ( chuckle )and really inexplicable for an explanation .. what more for sharing... i am soo sorry here. i mean it.

but then, 1 thing that i can assure you ... I can't simply let my mind just let go the sweet and worse memories i had shared together with him ( my ex-BF). And i guess i fancied the saying " its take a minute to love someone but taking a long time to forget him/her.." (its something like that)

Believe me, i had tried so many times and so many things to put in our relationship again but everything doesn't goes right. May be i just have to "let the time fix it" or "whatever happen ... happen" and go on forward with a black hole inside me. What say you..??

Anonymous says:
March 1, 2011 at 8:08 AM

Hi Mea..
We meet again! :)

Well frankly, from my point of view & from what have u commented. I can't certainly say & put 100% of my understanding towards your previous experiences & situation.

Simply because you didn't really mention what exactly is wrong between you & your Ex. Excuse myself if i make it sounds harsh to you. But may i question you once again;

- WHAT EXACTLY HAPPENED BETWEEN BOTH OF YOU & YOUR EX?

- WHY AFTER FEW YEARS OF BEING TOGETHER, THEN ONLY YOU GUYS THINKS OF 'DIVORCE' IS THE BEST SOLUTION?

:)

For the time being, i can only questions you as i don't really see the point which leads to your guys separation. Unless if you answer my question.

Anyway, thank you for sharing Mea. Would be glad to hear more sharing from you soon.

And, just for sharing..
I too actually did faced the same experiences as yours with regards to the frustration in relationships. But, as for me i cannot or even put an effort to fix the relation. To make it clear, 3rd person has come between us :)

Mea L. Antaim says:
March 2, 2011 at 5:19 AM

Hello anonymous ...
Wow ... seems like u r concern to my life relationship ... thanks but i am not open for further sharing. (^~^)--->>Sorry. but still i can only answer u broadly and not specifically.

Back to your Question.
1.What actually happened between my ex and i ... emmm how to tell u..?? simple question but hard to elaborate ... may be i can just simply said tat I am not "the one" for him and i am not good enough for him... but our "divorce" is not due to third party.

2. y "divorce" is the best solution..?? I dun no ... as for me it is the worse and stupid solution ever being made by both us..or maybe he (my ex) think through "divorce" everything will be back to normal and he totally sacrifice our relationship for that ( freedom, success, new GF) haha.

well, i guess my broad explanation bring satisfaction to u and i am sure there is no other way to fix or make it right. I need to fade up hope finally and keep moving forward.

I appreciate ur concerned anyway...thanks.

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