~Sharing Of Life's Journey~....

"Mea, i need your help on ....." -> 1st request granted and help given with Sincere Heart.

"Mea, Can you help me ...." -> 2nd request also done with full green light .

"Mea, I need your favour ..." -> 3th times ... my eyebrows start to shrink.

How about the next and next "Help" needed by the same person on the same matter in the same situation? What would you think of this person? Are you still going or be able to lend your hands or your energies or your time for that person? How if this situation continueous day by day? Aren't you going to start questioning your sincerity on helping her/him? And when you do, do you still intend to give your best help for that particular person? Would you agree when i say "we have our own level of compassion".

I tell you what ... Compassionate nature is essential in our personal life but when the level of "Patience" reached to the highest level, we can't even tell the difference between compassion and Disgust. Yeah!! i know i shouldn't wrote about this but this is what i eventually felt for the past month. When i finally reached the peak of the "patient", Sincerity become the question and at one point i started to mumbling and even want him/her to suffer a while before help is given. (the part that i hate the most) but i can't resist from respond late on the request and more worst declined to help..(then fell guilty later).

I did read few books about the miracle of helping others. All those stories are about inpirational and spiritual stories that warms the heart of the readers (including myself). Well, Reality are suck!! when we try to become a Good Samaritan for others, some will take advantages on your kindness and generousity. When we say "No" ... the question on "how if i am the person who in need?" came cross to our little box of mind. While we say "Yes" but infact "disgust" inside is a burden to our own self and can eventually became a "sin" because of insincerity. (God forgive me, i pray).

In fact my belief is "when you good with others, others will also treat you good in return" but i seems don't see the knot in it. Seriously this trully challege me on my good deeds & shake my belief a lot. I know everyone of us is not perfect but how i wish i can keep up my faith on believing that "be good" "no to Jelousy" "give a helping hand" will eventually lead to perfection of life.

For you out there who is reading this right now ... no offences ... this short writting of me is merely for sharing and as a reminder for me as well so that next time i'll always "help" with a Sincere heart!!

~m3@~

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